What will Happen If You Eat Human Brains?

human brain

To figure out what happens when you eat people and their brains, let’s take a look at the Fore tribe of Papua New Guinea.

Up to as late as the 1960’s, the Fore tribe consumed their dead as a funeral ritual. They stopped because in a strange twist of fate, scientists found out when they ate human brains, they could contract a disease known as Kuru, which would feast on /their/ brains! Kuru is a Transmissible Spongiform Encephalopathy disease defined by bent and misshapen proteins, or prions, in your brain that degrades neurological function. They wreak havoc on the gray matter of the brain, leaving it looking like a deformed sponge. You could say this is no.

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But actually, it is because its symptoms include random bursts of laughter, along with tremors and severe headaches in the earlier stages of the disease. The incubation period can last anywhere from a few years to as many as 60, but once it starts, a person only has a few years to live.

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So, besides the obvious ethical reasons, you shouldn’t be having any protein-people shakes just in case their brains got in there. What about eating other parts of the human body, though? As a whole, a grown man totals a little over 80,000 calories according to a recent study. That’s quite a lot of protein and fat! It seems far more reasonable to just eat an arm or an organ.

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Wow, did I really just say that? Anyway, an arm would be about 1,800 calories while the average human heart has about 720 calories. So, if a cutie steals your heart this Halloween, tell them they owe you a few Snicker’s bars from their candy haul to make up for it! While there hasn’t really been any diseases associated with eating other parts of the body, it’s not the best nutritional idea because of all the saturated fat you would get if your diet was primarily human red meat.

The American Heart Association recommends only about 5% of your daily calories come from saturated fat, so you should probably stay away from human or fatty meats in general. Anyway, I hope you all have a safe and happy Halloween! Tell those zombies they’d be better off eating something other than your /brains/! What are you looking forward to eating this Halloween? Let me know in the comments below. If you only eat human flesh, you definitely won’t get the nutrients you need.

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